Mass of Indifferents
Recall the moment I mistook
the falling snow outside for a cloud of swarming
flies: midnight, a late March flurry
swirling in a shaft of light, until the light
darkened in the silence of early spring.
Almost wholly inward, dead
to the world like that fresh corpse
that was actually a pile of black
trash bags. Crows circling above:
a dread omen, but not really.
Nature behaves correctly but is probably
unfortunate. I tell myself,
losing you was like losing a part of my body.
I tell myself, stop being stupid. Somewhere off
a mountain highway I’m trying to decide
which soda to get, and I pick the cherry one,
and I’m living a virtuous life.
Somewhere off a Florida highway anyone can buy a dead
baby shark preserved in blue formaldehyde
or a cross made of seashells.
We exist as limbs
of the whole, not as mere pieces.
Losing you was like losing a part of my body.
I suck at an orange slice, burn a cut on my lip.