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Cass Donish

Queer Time

We’re living in dead time

 

so many times 

        before I lost her 

I almost lost her

 

        though her skin  

                was warm as wine 

        in a sunned jar

 

and she talked about it

        how close she’d gotten

                to that threshold

        that world in which

 

she was already 

        wind in fig tree 

                shocked light 

        cypress tilt​      hawk light

 

We’re living in dead time

 

        though I held her 

                sunned shoulders

        in my two hands

 

the thought was here

        when she was alive

                that she could have 

 

                                already

*


 

Dead time. Borrowed time. A window narrowing. A tipping point. I felt like I was watching

her die. It was hardhard for others to seesee even whenwhen we tried to say       

 

everything.

 

                        I cherish the years we had after the first scares.

 

 

*

 

        my heart is cool now

                made of discolored clay 

        images flow backward

                pounding under pressure

 

        my knees are shunned 

                blue oranges

                                washing into the sea

 

We’re living in dead time

                as common as

                        uncommon

                for our kind

author photo moon_Donish.jpg

 

Cass Donish is a queer poet and writer from California. They are the author of the poetry collections Your Dazzling Death (Knopf, 2024); The Year of the Femme (University of Iowa Press, 2019), winner of the Iowa Poetry Prize; and Beautyberry (Slope Editions, 2018). Their nonfiction chapbook, On the Mezzanine (Gold Line Press, 2019), was selected by Maggie Nelson as winner of the Gold Line Press Chapbook Competition. Donish has taught creative writing at Washington University in St. Louis, University of Missouri, Kenyon Review Young Writers Workshop, and Ashland University’s low-res MFA program. They live in Columbia, Missouri, where they host the Ladybug Salon.

Bear Review

10.1

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